"I make things," I said.
After an eye opening interview that gave me an idea of what it feels like to speak about something you truly love and believe in while knowingly being judged for it, I had no nerves when asked what it is I do, in front of 100 plus people at a scholarship dinner.
With a smile on my face, and my Kai by my side, I said, "I make things! Accessories, creatures, jewelry, you name it, I'll make it."
It is incredible what happens when you put the energy out there, and wait for the opportunities to arise. When they surface, you have to jump. You have to go for it. Leave behind the "stuff" you've been carrying around, and just leap with a big ol' smile painted across your face.
After my interview on Friday, I went home and squealed about it, over and over, it was like a tide coming in. Swell after swell of joy, reassurance, stability, excitement, pride, ease, calmness, all at the same time.
I created things all Saturday, and today, Sunday, I have been going through my closet. After looking into that dark, tangled mess of matted clothes, I started a basic google search for apartments. I know, I am not quite there yet, but I can feel it coming, and I can't wait. I think I will like having the pressure to buy what I need, not what I want. That box will keep me in line. I will have to get creative with what I have and I like that. I need that. I am prepared for the challenge and welcome it openly.
The weather, despite it being accompanied with the eery humming of climate change, has allowed me to ride my bike the 1.5 miles to school every day this week (except Friday to prevent showing up sweaty for an interview). This was an empowering, enlightening, challenging and deeply needed experience. I have slept deeper, felt better, grown muscles and feel better connected to my daily life.
I would love to get a speedier bike to cruise around in, like the real cyclists do, but I have to say, I love my bike, and I love the challenge that it gives me. I appreciate what I have and I want to keep that feeling going.
Namaste & Happy Spring,
E.B.
